Christmas comes full circle

Do you ever wonder why it is that childhood Christmases seem so idyllic when we look back at them?

I’ll tell you why:

1.      We were the children and not the ones who had responsibility for creating the perfect experience.
2.       We didn’t have to do the shopping or the cooking.
3.       We didn’t have to deal with family politics.
4.       We were the ones who got sackfuls of presents.
5.       We didn’t have to do the washing up.
6.       Although we might have been aware things didn’t always run smoothly, it wasn’t our problem.

The only negative thing about Christmas I can remember is wanting to be an angel in the school nativity play at the age of about five, and being told I wasn’t blonde enough. However, if one of the blonder angels should drop out I could take her place. Of course, nobody dropped out of the angel line up so I never got to put on the wings and tinsel and join the heavenly host.

Christmas was a time set apart, a time to play games together as a family, a time for the sort of treats we didn't see the rest of the year. Really special. 

The years rolled by, and the age of partying came and went. Eventually parenthood arrived and the Christmas responsibilities increased at the same rate as the family did. It was great to make a good time for the children. We had some lovely times as a family. Things weren’t too complicated, there wasn’t enough money to go mad. It never occurred to me to get into debt to buy the kids fancy presents, but they didn’t mind (at least they tell me they didn’t). I wasn’t pressured by ads on TV because we didn’t have one. We made our own family traditions, kept things reasonably simple and enjoyed ourselves, even though it was hard work.

Then somehow things got more complicated or maybe I was just getting older. My parents and parents in law started to give me money to buy presents for the family. I completely understand that and I now do the same for my grandchildren – much better than wasting money on something they might not like. Grandparents are notoriously bad at gauging what young people want. It also puts a stop to grandparents buying stuff that annoys the parents, like drums and whistles and toys that play irritating tunes and drive you up the wall. However, it did mean that I had to find three sets of presents for each child plus stocking fillers. This was before internet shopping too, so lots of trawling the shops.

Anyway, long story short, one year I started to realise I was dreading Christmas and I had to admit it.

 I’m not one of those amazing hostesses who are organised and efficient. No way could I live up to the image in my head of how I ought to be. So, sadly there came a time when I just didn’t like Christmas at all. Too much scope for getting everything wrong. Too much stress. Not enough time and energy.

But with age comes a measure of wisdom. You get to see the bigger picture and you no longer care about getting everything just perfect. So now I refuse to get in a tizzy about anything. I will get to see all the family in one go, at least all the ones who live in the UK, at the annual Family Knees-up. I’ll have another Christmas Day with my precious parents who never criticise my cooking or anything else. No weary shopping trips, it’s all done online.  No worrying if the presents I’ve given are ok. I’m warm and cosy among the twinkling lights here; the cupboards are full of treats. Basically, it’s almost like a second childhood only with alcohol, and I’m free to enjoy it all again.